Guardian Series: And Finally, Don’t Forget To Enjoy It

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Victoria Coren

It’s quite fun, this Guardian experiment. They’re having a games slot every day – bridge, chess, that sort of thing – and I’m doing the poker one. It’s aimed at the fairly new player, who might have watched a bit of poker on TV and just started playing with their friends and wants a few tips. So for the moment in the column I’m generally advocating caution and covering basics – it’s a way of trying to help people avoid losing all their money in their first few weeks or months playing the game! If the links are going up on the Hendon Mob page, I hope I don’t get a flood of people shouting at me on the forum – ‘What do you MEAN, pass A9 before the flop?’ and that kind of thing. This isn’t complex stuff to be debated by people who have already been playing for years – it’s just start-up tips and ways not to go broke. Whatever I tell the Guardian, I’d probably stick the lot in with A9 cos I came here to gamble…"

Vicky… x

(Vicky is sponsored by PokerStars.com. Her poker column appears every Thursday in the Guardian G2 section)

Newest Article by Vicky

• And Finally, Don’t Forget To Enjoy It, 10th of January 2012

Vicky’s other Guardian Articles

• Bite your tongue, 25th August 2005
• Introduction, 23rd September 2005
• Poker on TV, 30th September 2005
• Poker Clothing, 7th October 2005
• Money, 14th October 2005
• Raising, 21st October 2005
• Aces, 28th October 2005
• A Single Ace, 4th November 2005
• Ace King, 11th November 2005
• Breaking the Rules, 18th November 2005
• Playing Kings, 25th November 2005
• Poker Chips and Christmas, 2nd December 2005
• Pocket Pairs, 9th December 2005
• Christmas Winners, 16th December 2005
• Suited Connectors, 30th December 2005
• Drawing Hands, 6th January 2006
• Televised Poker, 13th January 2006
• Luck Versus Skill, 20th January 2006
• Bluffing, 27th January 2006
• Bluffing Situations, 3rd February 2006
• Semi-bluffing, 10th February 2006
• Beyond Your Two Cards, 17th February 2006
• Position, 24th February 2006
• Taking a Card, 3rd March 2006
• Mix It Up, 10th March 2006
• The Tournament Trail, 17th March 2006
• Online Tournaments, 24th March 2006
• The Perfect Balance, 31st March 2006
• It’s only a game, 7th April 2006
• Women and Poker, 14th April 2006
• Celebrity Poker, 21st April 2006
• A Different Sort of Hero, 28th April 2006
• Counting Your Stack, 5th May 2006
• You Must Feel a Greed, 12th May 2006
• Accounting for Your Opponent’s Stack Size, 19th May 2006
• Half a Hand, 26th May 2006
• Poker is Cruel, 2nd June 2006
• Home Games, 9th June 2006
• Poker Literature, 16th June 2006
• Strategy Thoughts, 23rd June 2006
• Strategy for Multi-table Tournaments, 30th June 2006
• Maniac at Your Table, 7th July 2006
• Online Behaviour, 14th July 2006
• World Series of Poker, 28th July 2006
• Back in Vegas, 4th August 2006
• Poker Celebrities, 11th August 2006
• 12 Million Richer, 18th August 2006
• Hold Your Tongue, 25th August 2006
• No Limit Cash Games, 1st September 2006
• No Limit Cash Games Part 2, 8th September 2006
• All-In…, 15th September 2006
• The European Poker Tour, 22nd September 2006
• How to Win £500,000?, 29th September 2006
• Poker Ban, 6th October 2006
• EPT Baden, 13th October 2006
• Poker Robots, 20th October 2006
• Betting on Poker, 30th October 2006
• Meddling in Things They don’t Understand, 6th November 2006
• Analysis is a Long-Term Profitable Strategy, 13th November 2006
• Poker Variants, 20th November 2006
• The Do-Re-Mi of Poker, 27th Novermber 2006
• The Benefit of Omaha, 4th December 2006
• Position in Omaha, 11th December 2006 (scroll down to poker section)
• Greg "Fossilman" Raymer, 18th December 2006
• New Year’s Resolutions, 8th January 2007
• Seven-card stud, 15th January 2007 (scroll down to poker section)
• Lowball, 22nd January 2007
• Seven-card high/low split, 29th January 2007
• A Secret About High-Low Games, 5th February 2007
• Poker Nicknames, 12th February 2007
• Teacup…, 19th February 2007
• Group Hugs Don’t Win Poker Trophies, 26th February 2007
• A Monkey Could Do Better…, 5th March 2007
• Poker Tells, 12th March 2007
• Women at Poker, 19th March 2007
• H.O.R.S.E., 26th March 2007
• GUKPT, 2nd April 2007
• Poker Is a Slippery Game, 9th April 2007
• Desperate Housewives…, 16th April 2007
• Charity Tournaments, 23rd April 2007
• Charity Tournament Part 2, 30th April 2007
• Could Be the Perfect Play, Could Be Suicidal, 7th May 2007
• Bigger Deal, 14th May 2007
• Characters in Poker, 21th May 2007
• The Old Principles of Craftiness, 28th May 2007
• Mental Focus, 4th June 2007
• Bet With a Bad Hand, 11th June 2007
• Bet Reasons, 18th June 2007
• The Message is Clear, Boys, 25th June 2007
• Crazy Games, 2nd July 2007
• Playing Against "Donkeys", 9th July 2007
• Do Not Try This at Home, 16th July 2007
• Brilliant or Goddamn Lucky, 23rd July 2007
• What is She Doing?, 6th August 2007
• Rule of Three, 13th August 2007
• That Buys a Lot of Oven Gloves, 27th August 2007
• World Series Comes to London, 3rd of September 2007
• Super-satellites, 10th of September 2007
• Head and Shoulders Above the Rest, 17th of September 2007
• Annette Obrestad, 24th of September 2007
• It’s Hard to Win the Same Tournament Twice, 1st of October 2007
• Knock-on Effect, 7th of October 2007
• "Ghosts at the Table", 15th of October 2007
• Three aces beat three jacks?, 5th of November 2007
• Goldfish, 12th of November 2007
• Sometimes a river card is perfect for you…, 19th of November 2007
• Help those poor suckers misplay their own cards, 26th of November 2007
• Ooh, it’s juicy, 2nd of December 2007
• Misleading Ideas in Opponents’ Heads, 10th of December 2007
• Exploit Mistakes, 17th of December 2007
• Mr Bun the Baker, 7th of January 2008
• Late Night Poker, 14th of January 2008
• Dealer’s Choice, 21st of January 2008
• Double Flop hold ’em, 28th of January 2008
• You Do Realise That’s a 50/50?, 4th of February 2008
• Price Your Bets Correctly, 11th of February 2008
• Don’t Change Your Mind, 18th of February 2008
• Let Me Tell You All About It, 25th of February 2008
• Quit When You’re Losing Enough, 3rd of March 200
• Sitting Pretty on the Right Side of the Table, 10th of March 2008
• After a Nasty Loss, 17th of March 2008
• Pretend That Others Don’t Exist, 24th of March 2008
• Chasing Rainbows, 31st of March 2008
• But Human Nature Hasn’t Changed…, 7th of April 2008
• A Remarkable Pot, 14th of April 2008
• Flying Blind, 21st of April 2008
• The Domino Effect, 28th of April 2008
• Long-term Winning Strategy, 5th of May 2008
• China Looks Like a Soft Touch, 12th of May 2008
• Bluff Gestures, 19th of May 2008
• Local Rules, 26th of May 2008
• Detective Work, 2nd of June 2008
• World Series of Poker 2008, 9th of June 2008
• Poker Shrewdies Round the Wheel, 16th of June 2008
• Betting on WSOP 2008, 23rd of June 2008
• Another Factor the Bookies Haven’t Considered, 30th of June 2008
• Each Hand Should Be Treated Like Each Night of a Marriage, 7th of July 2008
• Slow-rolling, 14th of July 2008
• It is Going to Cause Some Pain, 21st of July 2008
• November Nine, 28th of July 2008
• Complicated Decisions, 4th of August 2008
• One-night-stand, 11th of August 2008
• The Secret of Winning Online, 18th of August 2008
• Is Poker a Sport?, 25th of August 2008
• A Timely Run-Through of Appalling Poker Behaviour, 1st of September 2008
• The New Term, 8th of September 2008
• Discovering Art, Culture and the Roots of Western Civilisation, 15th of September 2008
• EPT Awards, 22th of September 2008
• Gamble: Either a Huge Hand or Nothing, 29th of September 2008
• Value-betting the River, 6th of October 2008
• The Stopper Bet, 13th of October 2008
• More About Value Bets on the River, 23rd of October 2008
• The Poker Nations Cup, 30th of October 2008
• I can Now Recommend Budapest, 6th of November 2008
• World Series of Poker: Timing is everything, 13th of November 2008
• A Question of Hands, 20th of November 2008
• Macho World, 27th of November 2008
• Premier League Poker, 4th of December 2008
• The Hidden Advantages of Day 1A, 11th of December 2008
• Another of Those Little Edges, 18th of December 2008
• The Joy of Sixes, 22nd of January 2009
• Expensive Decisions on the Flop, 29nd of January 2009
• Blind Bets and Winning Hands, 5th of February 2009
• Mad Men of the Premier League, 12th of February 2009
• In a League of Its Own, 19th of February 2009
• Know Your Limits, 26th of February 2009
• The Dangers of Slow Playing, 5th of March 2009
• A mixed-up world, 19th of March 2009
• Mind the Red Herring, 26th of March 2009
• The Momentum of a Card Game, 2nd of April 2009
• Stunning Chutzpah of a River Bet, 9th of April 2009
• Private Room at the Vic, 16th of April 2009
• Curious Tradition of the Live Game, 23rd of April 2009
• Charitable Spirit, 30th of April 2009
• Tindall has the Knack, 7th of May 2009
• Losing streak, 15th of May 2009
• Turbo Tournaments, 21st of May 2009
• All About Going All-in, 29th of May 2009
• Think twice before playing in the World Series of Poker, 5th of June 2009
• Finding Your Level, 12th of June 2009
• Brits Triumph at the World Series, 19th of June 2009
• Poker Tournaments are a Masochistic Pursuit, 26th of June 2009
• 2009 World Series of Poker – Judge Opponents by Their Game, 3rd of July 2009
• The Most Exciting WSOP Final Table in Years, 24th of July 2009
• The Dragons’ Den Investors Got It Wrong About Poker, 31st of July 2009
• When They Call, Show Your Hand, 7th of August 2009
• Mike ‘the Mouth’ Matusow: a True Original, 14th of August 2009
• Perhaps it’s Time to Get Back to Basics, 21st of August 2009
• Hurrah! Late Night Poker is Back, 4th of September 2009
• A Half-open Hand, 9th of September 2009
• Cancel the canoe – I’m not giving up poker yet, 16th of September 2009
• I’d forgotten just how the game has changed in the last 10 years, 23rd of September 2009
• A hand that nearly made me cry, 30th of September 2009
• I admit it – I lost my bottle at the crucial moment, 7th of October 2009
• More aggression, less patience: how to play heads-up, 14th of October 2009
• It’s tough trying to keep up with the latest trends, 21st of October 2009
• The hand where I made the wrong move at the right time, 28th of October 2009
• The Full Tilt Late Night Poker final begins, 4th of November 2009
• Joe Cada: the new world champion of poker, 11th of November 2009
• What was Patrick Antonius playing at? I’m not sure, 18th of November 2009
• A welcome return for the £500 buy-in tournament 25th of November 2009
• The one poker skill you can’t teach 2nd of December 2009
• Has online poker finally come of age? 9th of December 2009
• The worst ever online bad beat? I don’t think so 16th of December 2009
• A holdem riddle, 23rd of December 2009
• Will next year see the death of British poker?, 30th of December 2009
• Christmas is over: time to sober up, 6th of January 2010
• The Bahamas PCA is becoming my favourite poker tournament, 13th of January 2010
• An amazing heads-up moment, 20th of January 2010
• Fast and loose: the French approach to poker, 27th of January 2010
• An expensive lesson from a surprising hand in Deauville, 3rd of February 2010
• Should I have gone all-in – or folded?, 10th of February 2010
• The perils of the kamikaze approach, 17th of February 2010
• Is it OK to play in a casino with friends?, 24th of February 2010
• Playing with friends, part 2: bluffing, 3rd of March 2010
• Disaster at the Berlin EPT, 10th of March 2010
• A call that shocked the table, 17th of March 2010
• A trap that went horribly wrong – or did it?, 24th of March 2010
• My first game with an iPod, 31st of March 2010
• The dangers of a weak raise, 7th of April 2010
• Is this a slowroll too far?, 14th of April 2010
• How do you play trips against a solid player?, 21st of April 2010
• Huge bets are not always the right tactic, 28th of April 2010
• Should you ever throw away KK?, 5th of May 2010
• How to play a 26-hour poker tournament, 12th of May 2010
• Is Nottingham the new poker mecca?, 19th of May 2010
• The real joy of British poker tournaments, 26th of May 2010
• Brits storm World Series of Poker, 9th of June 2010
• The World Series of Poker goes from strength to strength, 15th of June 2010
• WSOP: yet another great week for Brits, 23rd of June 2010
• WSOP: Record-breaking success for the Brits, 30th of June 2010
• WSOP: The Main Event Starts Here, 7th of July 2010
• The poker pro who has retired at 24, 14th of July 2010
• Who are the ‘November nine’?, 21st of July 2010
• Loose cannon or solid player?, 28th of July 2010
• The amazing Annette Obrestad, 4th of August 2010
• A hand that still haunts me, 11th of August 2010
• A key hand from the UK Poker Tour, 18th of August 2010
• If in doubt, don’t bluff, 25th of August 2010
• Don’t forget, poker is a head game, 1st of September 2010
• The danger of small pairs, 8th of September 2010
• Guardian Series: What a great prize night, 15th of September 2010
• How do you measure a poker player?, 22nd of September 2010
• Devilfish, master of the baize, 29th of September 2010
• The trouble with aces, 6th of October 2010
• Stick with the plan… usually, 13th of October 2010
• With better cards, I’d have done better, 20th of October 2010
• When Gus Played Phil…, 27th of October 2010
• Victory of the Homeboy Hero, 3rd of November 2010
• Hail the Champion, Jonathan Duhamel, 9th of November 2010
• Life Lessons of the New World Champion, 17th of November 2010
• The Misdeal That Proved a Winner, 24th of November 2010
• The benefits of playing loose-aggressive, 1st of December 2010
• Playing hard and loose, 8th of December 2010
• The phenomenon that is Tony ‘The Lizard’ Bloom, 15th of December 2010
• Why Tony Bloom’s old school raising style is the way to go,  22nd December 2010
• A new year’s resolution – pay attention, 5th January 2011
• Making the hero call, 12th January 2011
• The ‘ladies only’ tournament, 19th January 2011
• The Lesson of the Women-Only tournament, 26th January 2011
• At Last, I Break My Deauville Duck, 2nd February 2011
• Learning from Others’ Mistakes, 9th February 2011
• Banana’s Winning Hand, 16th February 2011
• A Game of Skill, 23rd February 2011
• Inside Story of a Coup, 2nd March 2011
• It’s not all about the cards, 9th March 2011
• It’s good to take thinking time – but not too long, 16th March 2011
• When Time Runs Out, 23rd March 2011
• Raising the Stakes, 30th March 2011
• The exception to my rule, 6th April 2011
• Let’s Talk About Loss, 13th April 2011
• Where have the Americans gone?, 20th April 2011
• Up and Down the Betting Streets, 27th April 2011
• Be wary of pre-flop bets, 4th of May 2011
• Level Thinking, 11th of May 2011
• Remember, it’s just a game, 18th of May 2011
• Don’t think so much…, 25th of May 2011
• How About a Game Where Every Hand is a Good One?, 1st of June 2011
• The Fun of Aiming Low, 8th of June 2011
• You Must Be Bluffing, 15th of June 2011
• Introducing the Badugi 2-7 Triple, 22nd of June 2011
• Look After Your Stack, 29nd of June 2011
• Fifteen men gatecrash the World Series ladies’ event. How heroic, 5th of July 2011
• Lesson of the Grumpy Geezer, 12th of July 2011
• The Last Brit Standing, 19th of July 2011
• When the Blinds are Big, Act Decisively, 26th of July 2011
• Never Forget the Importance of Chip Counts, 3rd of August 2011
• A Stack of Trouble, 9th of August 2011
• The Basics of the Stack, 16th of August 2011
• Stacks of Information, 23rd of August 2011
• The Chip-Count Quiz, 30th of August 2011
• Poker: The player who misses the point, 6th September 2011
• If you don’t have to show your hand, don’t, 13th September 2011
• Never Too Late to Learn, 20th September 2011
• Taking the AK Challenge, 27th September 2011
• Now Here’s a Weird Hand…, 4th of October 2011
• When the Young Guns Challenge the Veterans, 11th of October 2011
• A subtle call, 18th of October 2011
• A ‘bad beat’ I might never forget, 25th of October 2011
• Barny Boatman’s Autumn Blaze, 1st of November 2011
• A New World Champion, 8th of November 2011
• Power to the Kids, 15th of November 2011
• What is the International Federation of Poker?, 22nd of November 2011
• How do You Find the Best Player in the World?, 29th of November 2011
• Why not Give That Second Pair a Go?, 6th of December 2011
• My Favourite Hand of the Late Night Poker Series, 13th of December 2011
• Five New Year Resolutions, 4th of January 2012
• And Finally, Don’t Forget To Enjoy It, 10th of January 2012